Its the biggest shopping day of the year -
the day after Thanksgiving – and its pretty clear
people wake up and with all they can muster
do just about anything for a Black Friday Doorbuster.
Do You know what a Doorbuster is?..
a ridiculous way to give a store your biz.
You have to get up real early and give up your sleep
and then stand in long lines to get something cheap.
Once you get in the store there may not be enough,
the store may be sold out of all the good stuff.
If there aren’t enough Doorbusters to go around,
you are left standing there tired and run down.
Doorbusters have limits or coupons required,
or fine print in which You can really get mired.
There’s loads of conditions and lots of controls,
enough restrictions to fill a black hole.
You have to be careful and read all the fine print
because its so early You really do squint!
I know I could save money at four a.m.,
but it would really cut into my quota of R.E.M.
There are specials at one in the morning – that’s right!
One mall had Doorbusters starting at midnight!
Lots of folks enjoy a good Doorbuster ad,
they go out with friends and they all shop like mad.
They have coffee or brunch and then make it a day
and get Christmas shopping out of the way.
But I don’t get up and chase Doorbuster Sales.
I don’t read the ads and the tiny details.
Sometimes I think I could be missing a steal,
but I’ve gotten along without all the great deals.
I keep more of my money when I don’t stray
and sleep in on Black Friday — Doorbuster Day.
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